3 is the way.
Have your goals. Feel your feelings. But don’t expect to jump to the other side of the ocean. Set small goals and revel in your daily/weekly wins.
For example, I wanted to eat better and save money, when I was young and had no money. It was harder then, but I tallied up all the fast food money I was spending, and realized if I didnt buy fastfood I could afford more and better groceries including more fresh vegetables and meats. And STILL saved some money.
So I watched my grocery bill and stopped eating fast food, ended up with some extra cash each month, and even lost a few pounds.
This is a small thing, but I felt more in control of my life, and it made me happy.
Modern banking apps have search features to make tallying your spending easy
But do you love snacks as much as him