Don’t take it personally, applying for a job is a game of chance as much as a game of merits. It’s simply a numbers game and luck whether your resume even gets looked at in the first place, even if you’re résumé how all their keywords. Hundreds, maybe thousands, of other resumes also hit their keywords.

If you’re lucky enough to get through the first sifting and get an interview with the hiring person (not an HR screener who doesn’t know anything about the job), then you can ask and maybe get a response on how you could have improved. (Don’t ask why you weren’t hired.)

Sorry to be very late to reply.

I know two people who were Christians in Afghanistan, they are both now in North America. When they were found out, they fled their homes with little more than the clothes on their backs to India. They did not know each other in Afghanistan (they came from different states), but became friends in India. One fellow was there for 7 years, the other for 14 years. India does not recognize refugee status, therefore they were undocumented (illegal) people with no rights or the ability to work legally. They got by by doing under-table work for cash and by the kindness of others. They still faced attempts on their lives in India, too, by other Afghan Muslims living there. Since they were not there legally, they could not go to the police to report the assaults. The guy who was there for 7 years, he was sponsored to leave India and go to another country as a refugee. After he settled and eventually became a citizen, he started the process to sponsor his friend whom he’d left behind. They, and their church, are now sponsoring more refugees.

Are they okay? That’s hard to say. I mean, they’re doing much better because they are safe, but they have certain behaviours borne from their hardships and traumas. They are very mistrustful of the government, for one; it’s basically unbelievable to them that there can be government programs that are beneficial to them. There must be strings, or some way for the government to spy on them. Sometimes I see self-soothing behaviours, like one guy kind of holds himself and rocks back and forth. They need therapy, but that kind of thing is not really within their radar. But they are still compassionate people who are very hard-working and dedicated to helping or saving others who were in the same situation as they were. I don’t think they will ever have “peace” so long as there’s more injustice to fight against in the world.

BBC series Merlin was a little like this. King Uther hated magic, Prince Arthur was kinda against it because he was told it was dangerous, but didn’t exactly hate it himself. Meanwhile Merlin took a job as a servant, doing magic-y things to protect him. Wasn’t a great series (writing), but it had enjoyable aspects.

I’ve found this to be true in general once I started working. I don’t feel kinda this was a thing when I was and was integrating with other students. I had to readjust my “responsible” self who actually would follow up (to people’s horror) and tell myself it’s a polite saying that people don’t mean. Like when people greet each other with “How are you?”, they generally actually do not want to know how the other person is doing. You’re expected to say “fine” or “good” and deviating from that is violating an unspoken social contract.

I know people who were Christians in Afghanistan, who were outed to the government (Taliban). The word they use is “spy”. It may not be the normal, English use of the word, but it’s the word that real-life people who have been on the receiving end of the betrayal use.

People are saying being funny and having confidence, and they’re right, and I’m going to tell your why. When being around you makes someone feel good, they will want to be around you more. That’s not exclusive to romantic relationships, it’s true also of friendships and business relationships, too.

An acquaintance asked me out not long ago, I declined. His looks had nothing to do with it, it was his negative personality. The few times I’d talked with him, all he ever did was complain about stuff. Complaints (without solutions) are inherently negative. I don’t need negative energy in my life. A romantic partner has to make life better.

If your expectation is for someone to come and make you happy, then you are a happiness-sink. You drain joy from other people instead of mutually building up each other. No one wants a joy-drain, and I’ll be honest with you, your attitude is one of a drain.

So, the question is, how do you make a someone’s life better? Do you being laughter to her? Do you make her feel safe? Do you give her confidence in herself? Do you bring interest to her life? Do you make her feel heard and seen? And to be clear, someone should do all those things for you mutually, too. Two people should be building each other up.

The last guy I wanted to ask out (but he abruptly lost his job and had to move to another city, so I never did) he was in his late 20s and already balding quit a bit, lanky, and has terrible posture. Physically, he not very attractive. But not only was he very funny (a good start), he was also doing his masters (intelligent and hard working), played musical instruments (passion and interest), and spent a lot of time volunteering (kind and caring). Everything about his personality drew new to him. (And honestly, next to that, what positive would I have brought to him?)

As a fountain pen user, I would suggest against that unless you know it suits her personality. Fountains pens require maintenance, and certainly it’s easy maintenance, but it’s definitely more work than a ballpoint. They are a hobby, and if it’s is not her thing, she’ll never use it.

I would instead recommend a nice ballpoint pen set where the ink can be replaced when empty. Something she can use without having to think about or maintaining it.

I went to a non-uniformed elementary school (which has since adopted a uniform), a uniformed high school, and then university which was obviously non-uniformed. I much preferred the uniformed years because I don’t care one whit about fashion I never had to think about what to wear.

Granted, my high school uniform had a lot of variety, considering. There were two cuts/styles for the long sleeved shirts, a short sleeve shirt, polo shirt, knit sweater, knit vest, knit cardigan, 1/4 zip sweatshirt, and blazer, which could be mixed and matched as you liked.

I don’t remember how the conversation came about, but in a previous office job, some discussion (among us low-level employees) came about regarding an office uniform. Most people were horrified by the idea, but I was totally for it.

Refusing to use nail polish remover to clean off permanent marker because that’s “for women”. It’s acetone, my dude, acetone.

I don’t know how he puts up with it, but I do know why. He was alone since he was a teen, and now his wife and in-laws are his only family. His dream has always been having a family and community. He’ll bend over backwards to please his in-laws. It’s unfortunate they treat him like that, and while his wife is sweet, she’s a pushover and doesn’t stand up for him.

Why the in-laws are like that? I don’t know.

Get this: my friend is “not allowed” to be left alone with his daughter. His own daughter. If wife needs to go out without baby, baby gets dropped off at grandparents (wife’s parents) instead of just staying home with dad. What’s even more ridiculous is his profession is early childhood educator. He’s more qualified than most other parents out there, male or female. I don’t know how he puts up with being insulted like that.

You might enjoy “A Christmas Movie Christmas”, where the protagonists wake up and find themselves as the protagonists in a Christmas movie reality. It’s a comedy where you basically laugh at the troops while they call themselves out on it.

As a non-Christian, I never made that Xmas connection.

Well, as a Christian, I wouldn’t feel bad about it because the poster is not correct. The X in Xmas does not stand for a cross, it comes from the Greek spelling of Christ which is Χριστός. The chi-rho symbol (☧) is an imposition of the first two letters (Χ and ρ) and is still commonly used to refer to Christ in some denominations.

As a bonus: if you’ve ever wondered (or not wondered) why some Christian symbolism uses a fish, ἸΧΘΥΣ (or ICTHYS) is an acronym for Ἰησοῦς Χρῑστός Θεοῦ Υἱός Σωτήρ, “which translates into English as ‘Jesus Christ, God’s Son, Savior’.” (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ichthys) This has been used since the first century.

Well, I mean, the obsessively and angrily chasing Aang party definitely shouldn’t be emulated, but he’s got a very good character growth arc.

• He learns his worth as a person (and as a prince) doesn’t come from his abusive father, but intrinsically from his own self.
• He gains the insight and humility to admit he was wrong and seek forgiveness from the people he wronged
• He learns to empathize with other people, and that he is his strongest when he releases (and is no longer clouded by) his anger and fights for good.
• He learns to appreciate the people who love him (Iroh) instead of chasing after someone who doesn’t (his father).

The world would be a better place of everyone could learn the lessons that Zuko learned.

I used to provide some user support at a previous job. (It wasn’t exactly my job, but people would ask for help.) And it’d be easy to get frustrated, thinking people were stupid or incompetent, but I’d remind myself that being good at computers isn’t part of their job, it’s part of my job. These people were hired for other areas of expertise. If I had to do take on parts of their jobs, I’d look stupid and incompetent too.

That said… sometimes the level of incomprehension people have really is incomprehensible to me. There’s a level where you’re reaching wilful ignorance. When I point at something on the screen and tell the person to click on that… and they can’t or won’t move the mouse there and click on it…