Oh sorry, I forgot the determinative. 💦3st

Sounds like the XY problem

It’s usually fine, but I download new TV shows automatically and I got a .exe instead of the new Frasier. I don’t think I’ll be downloading an actual .exe from TPB in the future lol

Several beings perish each cycle from this

Dehydration was never an option

I once got passed by two speeding DeLoreans. I ended up catching up to them when we all hit a traffic jam.

You win a free trip to the Hague

If it makes you feel any better that horse wasn’t the one that killed him

me_me_irl_irl

Monkey’s paw: your teeth would also be as sensitive as the head of a penis

I’m already 2 years older than Mozart was when he died, the fuck am I even doing with my life

This reminds me of how I used to eat a spoonful of chunky peanut butter and then add a glug of maple syrup

But I can still keep the dinosaur, right?

Xande: oh HELL no

Gussy

Damn dude, save some pussy for the rest of us

About 10 years ago someone actually burned to death from static discharge at a gas pump like 2 miles down the road from my house. It’s extremely rare, but it does happen.

“You guys are still staffing window 1?”

Thank

I’m sorry your ice cream doesn’t have any sugar in it