Yeah. I’ve always been cut so I’ve always needed something.

It depends on the situation. As a penis owner, it’s very rough without lubrication, but I don’t always have access to something. So in those cases, I lick my hand to provide something.

Granted, I have to do it repeatedly otherwise the friction gets worse than using nothing.

I get it. A personality seems like a hard thing to find sometimes.

About half and half. If I’m masturbating to something, it’s usually amateur work because porn has been really meh for a while now.

I have not, but both people I’ve slept with were not virgins. My wife, though, didn’t intend on sleeping with me as quickly as she did. I joke that I wooed her with my terribly awkward, nerdy charms.

Oils make sense, but I personally don’t trust vapes. If you find something that works, you should share.

Nothing sexy this weekend. I cleaned, read a book, and took the family to see Labyrinth at the theater. I think my wife and I were the only ones enjoying ourselves.

We’re about the same height. She’s plus size, and I’m slim-ish. There are no positions that we straight up can’t do, but there are limitations. Our similar height actually makes sex standing up pretty easy.

For PIV sex, I need to be aware of my angle so I don’t ding her cervix. She also needs to be very turned on and lubed up before I can go in due to my girth. So no quickies unless she’s really horny already (which is rare due to life stress).

We haven’t done anal because of a very shit experience with her ex.

Receiving oral is good, but there’s always the danger of teeth. There’s no issue of my giving her oral.

I hate when someone puts a bra size into their story. They almost never know how bra sizing works, and it immediately irritates me. I’ve seen a lot of 32in waisted women that somehow wear a 44F bra 🙄.

I’ll describe shapes and sizes, but from a character’s point of view. I’ll write it in a way that a regular person might have described through conversation or reaction. Sort of like your preferred example.

I know exactly who the character is, and in any normal circumstance I would write it on the more realistic side. Some of the character interactions are a bit unrealistic, but not wildly so. More, a “this is unlikely to happen between these two people”.

What I’m asking is if those that enjoy reading erotic fiction want the sex itself to be physically exaggerated, or if they prefer it to be grounded.

That is an ass that deserves all the love.

I don’t think it would matter to me. I would, at minimum, assist in the management of their career since there’s a history of exploitation and abuse in the industry. I don’t know if it’s still that way these days, but you can never be too sure.

Okay. Preface: I’m not a professional writer. I just like doing it in my spare time. I’m okay at best.

First: Read everything. Not just your favorite author or favorite genre, but everything. Especially read things by people that are different from yourself. This helps give you a well of ideas and personalities and perspectives to pull from.

Second: Start your initial writing by just spewing out whatever is in your head. Don’t worry about grammar or anything like that. Just write. You can go back and edit later. Which you should absolutely do, even if you think you got it the first time. When you do go through editing, read it like it was the first time seeing these words. If things seem off, or you notice things like a lot of word repetition in your descriptions. Stop and think about other ways to form the sentence. Maybe pull up a thesaurus for a buffet words to roll around your tongue.

Third: Dialogue can be tricky for some people. I have two suggestions. First, try saying your dialogue out loud. Act it out like you’re the characters. Do both sides and emote like the characters would. See if it feels awkward or stilted. Even if you’re doing erotic writing, saying the words out loud will give you a feel for how it’ll sound when people read it in their head. The second part of this suggestion, is to read scripts. Scripts are almost entirely dialog, and reading them will give you a feel for the back and forth action that makes up a conversation.

Fourth: Unless you’re writing for a group of church ladies that want to read erotic stories while hiding the juicy bits behind innocent words, try to keep the euphemisms for sex things grounded to what actual people would use. If you’re fucking a woman, are you going to ask if you could lick her “flower” or enter “her core” or pleasure her “love button”. And with men, avoid shit like “sex missile” or “sliding in to the hilt” or "member ". Again, think about words real people would use in a real situation. And, hey, if those are things you actually say, then use them and more power to you.

Yeah, but I’ll do like a High Hefner silk robe.

I’ve thought about crop tops, but I’m worried about finding the right size since I’m 6’.

Fun how? Like patterns and such, or something more like toe socks or thigh highs?

Good. I have most of that. Just missing the vest.

Just a wizard hat? That could be hot in the right context.

Technology is my day job, and I have a lot of experience with CMSs. I don’t want to spend my free time managing a server to run just one application, so I’m sticking to PHP (I have a few things I run already on it). However, the options in that space are not the best. WordPress and Drupal are just a nightmare of plugins with archaic template concepts. There are more modern options like Craft, but I’ve been through a few major version upgrades on Craft. Having to damn near rebuild the site each time is too much headache.

I’m currently almost leaning towards Grav, but I have mixed feelings about their documentation. It has a lot, but feels a bit sparse on some topics.

I don’t want my soul drained! That’s how you get your soul drained!