When I was in 2nd grade, I was stuck in a corner for participating too much. This character flaw has followed me all my life. My ex told me people didn’t like me because I shared my thoughts too much, and I just got feedback from my boss about the same thing.

The thing is, I’ve tried to stop my whole life. I only participate maybe 10% of the time, and I generally try to let others speak first unless no one is speaking up. But I’m still getting this feedback. I’m like a bull in a china shop, knocking down everyone no matter how careful I try to be.

The only solution I can come up with is to assume no one wants to hear from me and disengage. Stop caring, stop thinking, and stop participating altogether. I already feel isolated from everyone. This is just making it worse. I think I have to face the fact that I’m not welcome in any degree.

Any other ideas?

  • criitz@reddthat.com
    link
    fedilink
    arrow-up
    45
    arrow-down
    2
    ·
    edit-2
    1 year ago

    You keep saying you only participate in 10% of conversations, yet everyone thinks you’re dominating the conversations. I think you’ve underestimated and dont really hear how much you are taking over. Maybe you could record a conversation and listen back to it. Maybe you’ll realize you’re taking over a lot more than you think.

    • Sunstream@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      5
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      1 year ago

      I replied with this to another user already by I think this applies here, too: I think what they meant was that they participate in only 10% of conversations because when they do they talk too much. Nothing about OP’s post tells me they’re not aware of the problem or in denial.