“Don’t trust the Jews”

When you hooking up with the girl who’s running through the whole football team and you ain’t got a condom

I’m in if it’s penis vore

Then it disappears and I say “Where House?”

What do we do? I’m so scared 🥺

https://youtu.be/xyo4Kp2OVUI?si=FIowBbwUSmr2fMj7

Ayo wtf?

Time to dust off the guillotines

I can’t fucking stand this guy, why does he keep getting roles. God damnit

But her birthday is next week!!!

My chair is sufficient thank you…until I game then they go on my bed…then back on my chair

Oh no I hope they don’t step on me

“Let them fight”

I’m waiting for people to just mod a fucking .45 Caliber into Baldurs Gate 3 so I can blast Gortash in his fucking head the first time I see him

This is how you keep a man on the toilet shitting blood after he gets Salmonella

It’s too late dude I opened this at work and now I have cum all over my pants way to go!

RAMIREZ! RETAKE BURGERTOWN AND GET ME A DOUBLE QUARTER POUNDER MEAL WITH MEDIUM FRIES AND A MEDIUM DIET DR. PEPPER AND IF THEY DONT HAVE DIET DR. PEPPER JUST MAKE IT A SPRITE I GUESS. ALSO ASK FOR KETCHUP PACKETS BECAUSE I DIDN’T GO GROCERY SHOPPING THIS WEEKEND AND I DONT HAVE ANY HEINX KETCHUP!

THEN TAKE THAT FUCKING JAVELIN AND BLOW THOSE COMMUNISTS FUCKS BACK TO BLYAK-VILLE!

British mfers be like: “OI gov nothing beats a classic bekfast like me ma used to make”

I’m going through residency right now and every day I experience a different episode from Scrubs. It’s scary how accurate it can be, even for how long it’s been since it came out

HEY!

Makes me appreciate The Road more cause everyone’s body in that movie SUUUUUCKED