It began with the forging of the Great Rings.

Three were given to the Elves; immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings.

Seven to the Dwarf Lords, great miners and craftsmen of the mountain halls.

And nine…Nine rings were gifted to the Race of Men, who above all else desire power.

For within these rings was bound the strength and will to govern each race.

But do you recall… The most famous one ring of all

One to pull them all

These names sound like a hell of a pansexual orgy.

All the elves have giant, hairy feet.

One Reindeer to lead them all, One Reindeer to guide them, One Reindeer to bring them all, and in the darkness blind them.